You know the expression, Let Your Freak Flag Fly? It’s not a freak flag. It’s also not necessary the thing that makes you you, me me, her her, him him. It’s actually whatever thing (or group of things) we mistakenly think we need hide or get over or improve upon before we can be seen or taken seriously or try the thing we long to do.
This is the message I’m getting over and over: I am enough. You are enough. We are enough. Exactly as we are, RIGHT NOW. We don’t need to fix it or clean anything up. All we need is the courage to embrace the beautiful messes we are right this moment.
Growing, learning, grieving, healing, self-discovery, new tools, all that is wonderful. But none of it is about self-improvement in order to, i.e., in order to be okay, be accepted, be seen, be approved of, be out in the world, be deserving of trying something, or having something, or wanting something.
The beauty part is—we’re all the same. When we see this in others, this laying bare the freak flag, the view into one’s vulnerabilities, we know it immediately. We’re drawn to it, even if the ‘it’ is not quite right for us, not quite our style. Still, there’s recognition and sometimes even giddy relief and immediately, a place opens up (or at least a crack) where we feel the permission to imagine, speak, and reach for what we truly want, the way we want it. Because what we truly want is never anything to judge or be suspicious of.
(Yes. I ended my sentence, my paragraph, and my post with a preposition!)